Pursuing the Literary

My college roommate is writing a book including all of her horrible dates. She has never been in a serious relationship, but she has had some crazy failures in the romance department.

I'm not pointing fingers. My failures have been more public, more embarrassing, and sometimes follow me around at parties. I'm just setting the scene.

I don't think I could do it. When I write, I have to be very careful to distinguish myself from my main character. She can be a little bit like me. If she looks similar, her job must be different. I think there's always too much of my personality in her, but I'm still new at this. Writing. Novels, anyway. I am very serious about not making her romance interest like anyone I was ever interested in. That way leads only to trouble. If she ends up with him: well, that can't be write. I didn't end up with him. If she doesn't: well, that can't be right. He seemed so good.

And then my heroine and I are both left scratching our heads.

At any rate, I really want to read my roommate's book (especially since she is loosely basing a character on me, who seems much more intelligent about romance than I am), but in the meantime, I am working on my own. Here are the current chapters:

Chapter 1: In Which Our Heroine Endures Her First Hangover of the Summer
Chapter 2: In Which Group Call and Response is Utilized and Old Flames are Encountered
Chapter 3: In Which Our Heroine Wears Black and Plays Go Fish
Chapter 4: In Which Juliet’s Balcony Speech is Recited, Backwards
Chapter 5: In Which Many Lips Meet For the First Time
Chapter 6: In Which Vodka Punch is Consumed Under a Blinding Sun
Chapter 7: In Which Champagne and Success are Slow Aphrodisiacs
Chapter 8: In Which Our Heroine Lusts After Waffles
Chapter 9: In Which Marshall Has Trouble Coming Out of the Closet
Chapter 10: In Which Izzy is Discarded and a Cranberry Bagel is Used as Bribery
Chapter 11: In Which a Soccer Team is Unfortunately Named
Chapter 12: In Which Rick is Disgusted and an Actor is Slapped in the Face
Chapter 13: In Which our Heroine Smokes Part of a Cigarette
Chapter 14: In Which There are Too Many Sweet Actors
Chapter 15: In Which Our Heroine Sparkles and Donuts are Discussed
Chapter 16: In Which Karma is a Krafty Kreature
Chapter 17: In Which Sushi is Eaten and More Than Just Woods are Entered
Chapter 18: In Which Male Gynecologists are Considered
Chapter 19: In Which the Importance of a Big, Blue Bucket Must Not Be Underestimated
Chapter 20: In Which Cara is Betrayed For Thirty Silver Kisses
Chapter 21: In Which Diana Does Not Say Fuck and an Ending of Sorts is Presented

I probably won't post again until 2006 (scary). Have a Happy New Year's, everyone! If you get in trouble...don't get caught! And don't puke on anyone. Or on any of their stuff. Happy New Year!